Showing posts from April, 2017

Selfies and the world of hollow 'Likes' '- A threat to the young minds- Part 1

Roses are red, Violets are blue I love Selfies, and so do you? FB FB, dear FB wall How many likes did I get in all? Some fall off a cliff, some fall off and drown in the sea and some fall off the train. He was somebody's young son; she was someone's adolescent daughter. Click on the link to read about selfie deaths in India alone- . Taking selfies is not harmful. It started as a mode of self-expression, and a means of communicating and connecting with others. But the story did not end here. Slowly and steadily, the art of selfies along with the advent of Facebook and Instagram took this self-expression to a different level. A level where every kind of attempt is made to gain approval, admiration and validation and gratification. This leads you to a form of obsession.People start looking for validation and become dependent on them. They literally throw the reins of their life, their self-esteem, their self-identity in other pe

Selfies and the world of hollow 'Likes' '- A threat to the young minds- Part 2

"Behind every peaceful mind is a deactivated social media account." Can we raise children to turn out to be responsible adolescents in this era of newly found 'narcissism' and 'power' to get 15 minutes of instant fame? Are there guidelines to ensure adolescents think once before embarking on ‘DANGER’  to themselves? ROLE MODELLING, EDUCATION, AND INVOLVEMENT STOP yourself first Be the person you want your child to become. Children learn more by observational learning. They see more than they hear you.  If you are a ‘Selfie King/Queen,’ it shouldn't surprise you if your child becomes a ‘selfie prince/princess’ and later become selfie-addicted teenagers.  Home is the first school; parents are the first teachers. Therefore, be mindful of what you are teaching your child consciously or unconsciously. Albert Bandura, known for the classic Bobo doll experiment, identified this basic form of learning in 1961. The importance of observational lea

Meaningful Parenting- Do I want an obedient child? Part 2

Is the aim to raise compliant children? Is obedience compliance? Disobedience in children is nothing but a natural, curious, exploring, testing, wondering, learning behavior. Or reacting – in the only way they know how – to a situation over which they have no control because they did not come into the world being wise. I doubt I would be happy to do something I didn’t want to do if the only reason I was given was ‘because I said so.' Can I not extend the same understanding to my child? If he asks me a 'why' for everything, what is so grossly wrong? Someone who is all of 2,3,4 or 5 years old has just started learning about the world and its ways. Doesn't he deserve the right to know why he should or why he shouldn't do something? Why should he just take orders and accept them as a given? And in the process, if he disagrees with me, I will feel disappointed, maybe a little offended, but I am looking at the larger picture . I am helping him to disagree, to think,

Meaningful Parenting- Do I want an obedient child? Part 1

Don't forget what I say is more important than what you say. I have just returned from an India trip, and I have come with a heavy heart and a sulking 4-year-old. Grandparents, both paternal and maternal, finally found a label for my child- Disobedient. And maternal grandparents carelessly said- like mum, like son. When his father joined me later...they added, "He is quite a handful. I must say, he needs training. He is very disobedient, and I am fed up with his why's". Another blow to the heart. We thought he was doing good. So, let’s understand what this obedience is. The dictionary defines it as “compliance with an order, request, or law or submission to another's authority.” Parents define it as "compliance with what they say without questions asked." Obedience in one's own child is not only desired but also enforced through various means. And how does obedience manifest itself behaviorally? Just the way