We Make Babies

By -


                          

It’s a busy morning, the kind where you stuff your mouth with french toast, dark golden, more burnt than cooked, leaving a smoky flavor, or that is what I say to you- it’s a kimchi grilled cheese sandwich, baby, just enjoy. You smile at me before gulping the coffee in one long swallow. Before you dash to the door, you make sure to leave some smokiness on my lips and inside my mouth too.  I blush, my heart spends most waking moments marinating in your thoughts and sleeping moments caramelized after our soft, tender lovemaking, the kind where the skin starts to melt and turn gooey like mozzarella enveloped in sweet brioche. We are in love, I am certain. That day we make a baby in the tiny galaxy of my womb. 

It’s a busy afternoon, and we both are at work. We are both poring over our screens in our respective cubicles and then a ping on our friends' group chat- somebody has sent a love quote with three red hearts and a couple of Ws after an A. It reads -'I love her, and that's the beginning and end of everything.'  Was Fitzgerald thinking of us when he wrote this? I wonder. The apricot sun is gentle, and our managers accept our excuse.  Thirty mins later, we are on our way back home.  Noodles, yes, I remember, we eat noodles, chili garlic noodles from Bercos, licking the green onion stuck on the corner of your mouth. That afternoon- we make another baby. We are in love, I am certain.

It’s nighttime. Our daughters are in bed, their eyelids shut, the magnolia flowers all over their blanket transcended to the land of Winne the Ppooh and Ariela and Belle. We sneak out of their room to tidy up their half-built Lego castle, broken Hotwheels cars, and the xylophone that starts to ring the moment we dump it in the toy basket. You dart, I dash, and then the music stops. We giggle and lie down on the jute carpet in the living room. I smell of fried sweet potato and you of vanilla, patchouli found in tear-free baby wash. It's magical how our bodies talk and agree. At the apogee of our bliss, we make a baby again. We are in love, I am certain.

It is a crisp morning again, and I am wearing a grey sweater. I need to remember the color of the sun. The girls are off to school, and I hastily eat the leftover oats soaked in milk flecked with half-eaten raspberries. The heavy bags under my eyes, more like ill-arranged sandbags to reduce the flood water damage, make me look old…old enough to be forgotten. I wipe something rolling down my eyes and type hastily-

Alright, ladies, it’s time. I’m getting a divorce. I’ve been trying to make this work for a  long time, but unfortunately, I have reached a point of no return: no love, no intimacy, not even friendship. I don’t want him with me in the house or in the same room. How do I do this? Where do I file? How do I file? Who do I need to talk to? He doesn’t want to leave the house and wants our daughters to stay with him… so I will need to fight him for that. Help me, please. Should I leave the house until the divorce is final? I have three children and need to start over and rebuild. I have a good job but need help with investments and planning. Share your bests contact, please. We both need to get out of this…if given a chance,  today, right now. 

There was a time we were like gentle showers, a good book, and a warm cup of coffee. We were like spring, the cherry blossom trees, and an evening walk.  We were like perennials planted on the dirt of life meant to bloom every year- every year bigger and better.  

And then came the lashing rain, the winter storm, the scorching heat. I thought we were well insulated, but leaks happen, and soon the flood waters entered our sanctuary and eroded what I thought would stand until eternity. There were times we longed for each other limbs, but our longing was biological.  We moved from restless boredom to self-imposed solitude - just when and how is a little murky. In breakups, sometimes, there's no single enemy- everyone bears some culpability. 

There was a time you knew the contours of my waist, the fold of my breasts, and the change in the brand of the shampoo. You knew it like people know water and melon, bread and butter, pancake and syrup. Exactly when did the pancake start to burn? Wasn't our world more freshly baked choco chip cookies? When did it turn carbon? Why didn’t we rouse each other from our stupor before it was too late? 

Today you and I are no more in love, I am certain. Some canyons and lightyears stand between us. We live under the same roof but have lost the wherewithal to make babies. We uncement bricks of our home, one at a time, and throw them at each other. Each day the bricks reduce, and the hole gets bigger, making us both vulnerable to the impending hurricane. Our children cling to us. They cry, but their tears are not enough. We make war. 

To read this piece on The Bloom, click on https://thebloom.news/we-make-babies-by-namrata-singh/

To read the BlogOfTheMonth on Momspresso, please click on We Make Babies


Image courtesy-Pixabay

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My son, his Spermarche, and his Sexuality

By -
Image
If a parent is trying to protect, care for, and educate a girl child on her sexuality, it is equally essential to provide the same to the boy child. Doesn't it take 'TWO TO TANGO'?  Giving attention to your boy child is equally important, if not more. If we made our boy children responsible adults, we ensure that the girls don’t need to move around with fear. Don't say then- I will not understand. I do because I have a son, and he is not a bull.  Click on   My son, his Spermarche, and his Sexuality   to read the full article. Image courtesy-Pixabay
Read more

Nutrition and Health Nugget- HDL -The good fat needed for our body-Taking control of Cholesterol

By -
Image
Have you gone for a full-body check-up? Four health numbers tell us how healthy or not healthy we are. Blood Pressure-Which we have already covered in previous articles. The other three are Cholesterol, Blood Sugar, and BMI or Body Mass Index. HDL is good fat which should be higher than LDL, the bad cholesterol. The Cholesterol and HDL ratio should be - total cholesterol below 200 mg/dL LDL cholesterol less than 100 mg/dL HDL cholesterol above 40 mg/dL The actionable in 'mindful eating ' includes - Raising HDL Eating more fruits and vegetables and the good fat found in avocados, fish, and walnuts. Fruits-Avocados, apples(Be cautious with the serving since fruits have their portion of natural sugar too). All kinds of beans and legumes(Kidney beans, chickpeas, lentils, red beans, black beans, etc.). Whole grain anytime every time-Bread or flour. Shift from whole milk to reduced-fat or fat-free. Some people also add water to their half glass of milk and then
Read more

To smooch or not to smooch.

By -
Image
I wonder if Indians smooch? They do? Really? Have they always smooched or it is some new found sexual angle? Oh, forget it! How does it matter? With our population, nothing matters. I had an idea about smooching back in school- the year 1996. You know how Chinese whisper works. When it came to ‘smooching’ what came to me was something to do with the tongue and esophagus. The implementation happened 15 years later in the most unsophisticated, an ‘atrangi’ and unhygienic way. For a middle-class Indian who is raised with the mantra- ‘ jootha nahi khate ’, smooching = sin. Unsanitary sin. Forget it! I am not a fan of a smooch. But what if my kid is? The thing is that the biological clock and the academic clock are in direct conflict when you enter your teens or hit puberty. Just when the world is putting the right kind of pressure on you to go to Stanford, your mind is solving calculus equations, your body is doing its own weird calculation...size? Inches? Bang
Read more